Blogrolecall

In case you haven't been paying attention -- and why the hell not?!? -- we have some fabulously fine writers-slash-contributors-slash-chicken-flayers to this site. Our current membership stands at seven, so chosen for its relation to other important distinctions of that value; Seven Soldiers of Victory, the Magnificent, Seven, the Seven Seals, and, of course, the Seven Deadly Sins of Man.

I feel, as the Originator of this Delicious Blog, it is my duty -- nay, my honour -- to introduce them to you:

SuperGenius - Priding himself on his vast intelligence, SuperGenius Version 9.5 is a mind of monolithic proportions. Capable of processing over eighty-centillion terraflops per picosecond, with storage capabilities equivilent to that of ninety-nine to the trillionth power dvds full of information, he is quick to ensure that you feel his pride in every statement he makes.

Fortune's Prank Monkey - Avaricious as he is, Fortune's Prank Monkey would have you believe that his intentions are wholly virtuous; desiring only the finest things in life, his greed knows little bounds, save for those of the repulsive "bargain section."

Lenny Briscoe - Despite simliarities to a television character of the same name, Lenny Briscoe seethes at the comparison; envious of the fame and celebrity afforded to his fictional namesake, he has dedicated his life to one of complete order, of which he is the law above all others.

Note: With the recent passing of Jerry Orbach, Lenny Briscoe has turned his attention toward a New York detective by the name of "Sipowicz."

HisGrace - Beneath a quiet exterior lies the cold, barren heart of a ruthless despot; committed to taking over the world, setting it free, and then taking it over again when the false sense of security has completely set in, HisGrace is a wrathful force to be reckoned with.

Augustine - With a love of life, food, movies and anything else he sees, Augustine Caligula Deluise (so named after the most lustful of the Emperors and portly actors) gives into his temptations, and seduces others with his riveting mannerisms and erotic wordplay.

Jack Tango - Due to a fractured hypothalmediamus (the portion of the brain dedicated to regulating media-intake), he remains engaged thoroughly within the concept of perpetual ingestion of entertainment and other self-gratifying actions; the gluttenous Jack Tango can be found wherever and whenever consumption can occur.

AzaTh0th - Forged in the firepits of Apokolips and set forth upon an unsuspecting world, AzaTh0th Xiatixis Marduk Melburniannannagannisfeltselior the Destroyer (AzaTh0th, for short) leads a life dedicated to slothful aggrandizing of those around him. Also, Jolt Cola.

Our eighth member will be joining us soon, thus completely ruining this literary allegory, but until then, together we remain the deadliest of all sins: Unftettered Internet Access coupled with Excessive Free Time.

Enjoy!